All Star Picks (AL today, NL coming tomorrow)

Inspired by my buddy Jordo (pictured above in his Under Armor gear) over at Rangers and Seinfeld, I decided to give my picks for the 2009 All Star Game.

American League

C, Joe Mauer: Unquestionably the best catcher in baseball, Mr. Sideburns missed the first month of the season but leads all backstops in virtually every major category, highlighted by his .459 OBP. Although it pains me to say, that's early 2000s Bonds-ian.

1B, Mark Teixeira: Probably the most difficult position in which to pick a starter, first base is stacked with talent this season. Of the 35 players in the AL with 40+ RBIs, 10 are first basemen. Although the power numbers are bunched at the top with Tex, Carlos Pena and Victor Martinez all having similar numbers, I give the nod to the better defensemen (it doesn't hurt the situation that he's a Yankee).

2B, Aaron Hill: Not a common name among the likes of Dustin Pedroia, Robinson Cano and Ian Kinsler, but he's earned it in 2009. Leading all second sackers in the triple crown categories and jump-starting the Toronto offense (5th in the bigs) will get you noticed.

SS, Derek Jeter: Obviously I'm going with my boy - I used to have a blog named after him for Pete's sake. This season he has quieted doubters who said he was getting old by pacing AL shortstops in average, OBP and jump-throws. With 17 steals through the first three months of the season, he's on pace for a career high of 38.

3B, Evan Longoria: Did you know Scott Rolen is batting .332? Me neither, but he still can't shake a stick at Longoria who is batting over .300 with 16 HR and 63 RBI. The Tampa Bay third baseman has cooled off considerably after batting .322 with 13 long-balls and 55 RBI through May, he had just three HR and eight RBI in June while batting a weak .236. It didn't effect the play of the Rays, though, as they went 18-7 to get back in contention for the AL (B)East.

OF, Ichiro: He's batting .372 - that's 40 POINTS higher than second place, the aforementioned Scott Rolen. Too bad that his team is second from the bottom of the bigs in the runs scored, so he has only touched home 37 times so far. Regardless of his tough other stats, his hits, average and outfield gun, he gets my nod.

OF, Jason Bay: He's making the Sawx tick. With 69 RBIs, he has 13 more than any other OF and leads the AL. The quiet Canadian has gone yard more than any of his cohorts and has an OBP almost 100 points higher than his average.

OF, Torii Hunter: It was a toughie leaving off Carl Crawford, who with 40 steals already, is on pace to swipe 83 bags in 2009. It's been over two decades since anyone stole that many bases (1988, Vince Coleman and Rickey Henderson). Enough about him, this is about the resurgent Hunter, who is well on his way to a vintage season, the kind he used to put up consistently in Minny. Good for him.

SP, Zach Greinke: Had him on my fantasy team last year, should have kept him. The 25-year-old ace has come a long way from leading the AL in losses in 2005. Greinke didn't give up an earned run until his fifth start and his ERA didn't go over 1.00 until his 11th start. He is on his way to a Cy Young in 2009 and a closet full of them over the next decade.

-Jesse

Random Thoughts - 6/25

For those of you who have seen The Hangover - You will probably laugh listening to this song again and for those who haven't - shame on you, go see it. I saw it by myself for pete sake.

I don't have a pic, but a lot of us on here are yankees fans and may know what I'm talking about - Brian Bruney hasn't worn a Major League Baseball licensed hat for his last 2 appearences. Does Bud Selig watch baseball? Shouldn't he have been fined by now?

--meatball editor's note: Here is a photo that we submitted to Uni Watch (scrolll down to see us get a shoutout!)

I really don't know what to say to this, but this may be the funniest article you read all year long.

Ex-Cons are offering advice to Bernie Madoff when he enters prison. My advice would be to purchase a butt-plug, if there is such a thing.

July 11 at 3 PM caps off Nude Recreation Week. Participating beaches across America will have thousands of people skinny-dipping. Here is the official web-site. The weirdest thing about this is there is a picture of a girl who can't be more than 13 years old on the front page. Does this fall into the category of child pornography even though they don't show anything in particular?

I'm a huge fan of HBO series and they are starting to come back after the long lay off. Entourage starts on July 12 and Curb Your Enthusiasm hits in the Fall. Also, HUNG - A new series starts this Sunday @ 10 PM. I have to admit, the guy/gal who wrote this is a brilliant person, what a great idea for a show.

-Mikey

Sneak Peek: Jesse's Toast at his Best Friend's Wedding

I thought I would treat the people to a preview of the speech I plan to give at my boy Jones' wedding. Here it goes:

Thank you for everyone who helped put this very special day together. I know Stephen and Annia had a big part in planning this incredible evening, but they could not have done it without the help and gudance of Joan and Dennis Jones and Annia's parents, Terry, Bernado and Joe. I realize I'm not the only one who traveled a distance to be here tonight, I know there are others, including Annia's brother, David, who came in from Florida. To everyone who traveled, both near and far, thank you all for coming and making this a special night for these two.

I haven't got to spend much time with Annia, because, as most of you know, I don't live in NY anymore. One thing I do know is that family is very important to her. This was made clear to me when I met her, along with Terry and Joe at Friday's when I was home for the holidays in 2007. Family tells you a great deal about a person and it's wonderful to see someone value their family as much as Annia does. Family is important to Stephen as well, obviously, since he still lives in his parents' basement.

On a serious note, I don't need to interact with Annia that much to know what kind of person she is. As I was reading about love to prepare for what I wanted to say tonight, I found this: “Tell me who you love and I will tell you who you are.” I know Annia loves Stephen very much, and that tells me everything I will ever need to know about her.

I've known Stephen for half my life and growing up together, we both made our share of mistakes. But moving forward, Annia will always be by his side, regardless of his missteps because as it says in Proverbs, “love covers over all wrongs.”

To close, I want to say, I couldn't be happier for you, Jones, I love you. Welcome to the family Mrs. Jones.

Please stand, put your glasses in the air and join me in wishing these two the best of luck and happiness for the future.

-Jesse

Summer's here

Emmanuelle Chriqui tossing out the

first pitch at a Dodgers game last week.

Summer is right around the corner and to celebrate it's arrival, I figure I should come up with a list of things to do, beats to listen to and sites to see during the warmer part of 2009.

While there are thousands of things you should do every summer, I don't feel like getting carpal tunnel, so I'll limit to a half dozen or so:

1.Get to the beach: preferably the ocean, but if not, get to a big lake

2.See a baseball game: a major league one if you can, but minor league will do, but little league will not

3.Go to multiple barbecues: because a hot dog cooked over charcoal doesn't get old

4.See a movie: summer blockbusters are named so for a reason

5.Be outside as often as you can: it might be hot if you live in the South, but you'll wish you were outside more when it's January and freezing out

6.Get a tan:

7.Mix up your menu: summer calls for some lighter drinks and meals for two reasons; you don't always want to eat heavy, rib sticking meals when it's hot out and you probably want to lose a few to look decent in a bathing suit.

Summer jams are an integral part of kicking it in through the dog days. Whether you are in the whip with your boys or posted up by the pool/lake with a stereo, or even doing some work outside, you need to have the beats to properly enjoy the weather. Here are some of my favorite cuts for the season:

Ruff Ryders Anthem (remix)- DMX and the Ruff Ryders

Beautiful- Snoop Dogg

Guantanamera- Wyclef Jean and Lauren Hill

How we Roll- Big Pun ft. Ashanti

Summertime- DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince

Rumpshaker- Wreckx n Effect

Wipeout- The Surfaris

Good Times- Ludacris and DTP

XXplosive- Dr. Dre

Today Was a Good Day- Ice Cube

Pump it Up- Joe Budden

Uh Oh- Lumidee ft. Busta Rhymes and Fabolous

Island in the Sun- Weezer

Runnin' Down a Dream- Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

You're Best Friend- Queen

This guy built a sweet monster out of construction barrels and it's hilarious looking.

Life Advice of the Week: This comes from AMC's Mad Men, "This is America, pick a job and then become the person that does it."

Word of the Week: Cupidity, extreme desire for material wealth

TFLN of the Week: "Malkin and Crosby: 2 girls, 1 cup"

Video of the Week: Every Week on Entourage

Great News Item of the Week: MEGAN FOX IS SINGLE (I love that she spells her name that way, not wasting time with the silent H that most Meg(h)an's have in it. Much less confusing.)

Last but not least, your Baby Game of the Week: Emmanuelle Chriqui, featured up top and here again:

-Jesse

Annoying Red Sox Stats

Yankees  vs. everyone else in the league not including the Red Sox:  34-18, .653 w%

Red Sox vs. everyone else in the league not including the Yankees: 28-24, .538 w/%

But since they have played each other they sit at a dead even 34-24, .586 w% with the tiebreaker to the Sawx on the strength of six head to head wins.

I guess I feel good about this since the Yankees play 144 games vs. everyone else and just 18 vs. the Red Sox every year.  They have to start turning it around, the law of averages demands so.  

Big Papi vs. the Yankees (up to the HR he hit in his fist AB vs. the pinstripes tonight):

In 20 at-bats, .350, 5 XBH, HR, 7 RBI

Big Papi vs. everyone else:

in 178 at-bats, .185, 13 XBH, 2 HR, 17 RBI

BGotW: Mary Louise Parker, because I just found out she isn't Sarah Jessica Parker's sister.

-Jesse

Random Thoughts - 6/3

Talk about getting knocked out cold - or dead. Best part to see the action is at about the 1:40 mark of the video.

For all you hard workers out there that are constantly looking for a way out of the grind - this is your cue to start looking through all of your old football cards

Stop working out and just sit on your couch all day, its better for you - trust me.

I guess if you can't stop it, why not try to promote it?

T.O is a manic-depressive, all he wants to do is be in the news - he needs people to talk about him. This is ridiculous.

Shorty went to highschool with me and is on the cover of Playboy College.

-Mikey

For the People - random thoughts

While watching the NBA Finals I thought it would be funny to compare Stan Van Gundy and Bill Belichick. The only thing they have in common other than winning is they can't dress themselves.

When am I going to catch a break?

Bear Grylls may be a phony, but this is going to be a lot of fun to watch

If you're having a bad day and need a laugh, this never gets old

Lineup for T.V tonight

7:00 - Yanks/Rangers

8:00 - Pens/Wings

10:00 - Men vs. Wild

-Mikey