Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Notes from Dallas

I'm in Dallas for a few days, my former home of two years+, visiting family, friends and dogs.  During the visit, I won't have as much time to post, but here are some thoughts and ruminations to get you through the week.

Man vs. Wild.  Is anyone keeping score here?  The "vs." implies that there is some sort of rivalry involved in the situation.  It ain't a rivalry.  How many episodes have their been?  Apparently we are at 33 and counting.  There's been nothing that resembles a rivalry yet.  It's 33-0, Bear and that's just what's been on TV.  It's probably more realistically similar to the Harlem Globetrotters record vs. the Washington Generals.  This is reminiscent of the Yankees  and Red Sox from 1919-early 2000s.  It was nothing until 2000 with the emergence of Pedro and Nomar when Boston started to show some life and make things interesting.  Come on, Mother Nature, bring something to the table here, please before Bear starts to get bored.  Anyone want to watch a bored bear?

Down goes #1.  Again.  Feeling a little bit of deja vu?  I am.

I didn't vote for Obama, but last week was undeniably historic, regardless what color your state is.  This one verse remix is off the hook.  I'll learn how to put videos directly on here soon enough.

"Best thing since sliced bread."  What's the deal with people saying that?  Imagine growing up in 1928, roughly around the time sliced bread was introduced.  How weak were the lives of American people when sliced bread was the hottest thing on the streets?  There are so many more things since then that are wayyyyy better than sliced bread.  I challenge the MITM fans to come up with a new phrase.  Comment away!

Speaking of old phrases..."Selling like hotcakes"  When were they just flying off the shelves?  How about "selling like weed at the University of Colorado,"  or maybe "selling like cheese in Wisconsin"?  Another challenge to the people to come up with some new ones.

Mickey Rourke is coming after Chris Jericho.  I'm currently watching a behind the scenes look on Air Force One and I remembered this hilarious scene from the 1997 movie.


-Jesse

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Celebs at the Margarito vs. Mosley Fight

Jim Lampley claims there are 500 people that the average American could recognize.  This is obvious hyperbole, but let's take a real count.  I can't see everyone, but here's a list of people I see in the first few rows:

Bernard Hopkins (kept standing and cheering all fight long much to the chagrin of Marky Mark)
Arnold Schwarzenegger (had the best seats along with Sly)
Sylvester Stallone (he's really had a lot of work done, it's clear when you see him in HD)
Toby McGuire
George Lopez
LaDanian Tomlinson (in the ring pre-fight)
Joe Pesci (wearing an Indians hat for some reason)
Ray J (also in the ring pre-fight)
Mark Wahlberg (dressed like a lumberjack)
Kevin Connolly (wearing funny sunglasses)
Babyface
Cuba Gooding, Jr.
...

In other news, we are seven rounds in as I'm writing this and Sugar Shane Mosley is absolutely DOMINATING Margarito.  This is the biggest crowd in Staples Center history (20,000+)

UPDATE:  9th round, Mosley just went after Margarito and the referee just stopped the fight as the Tijuana Tornado fell to the mat for the second round in a row.  Here's a round by round read on the beatdown.  Sugar Shane TKO!

Earlier in the evening, Margarito's wraps were found to  have some plaster of Paris on them during a pre-fight inspection.  Margarito's hair is terrible.  It's like a faux hawk rat tail combination.

-Jesse

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Tale of the Tape

Bear Grylls (Man vs. Wild) and Les Stroud (Survivorman) are often compared by fans and critics alike.  Here's a breakdown of the two men's strengths, weaknesses, skills and oddities.

# of seasons:
LS: 2
This one is obvious.
Advantage: Bear

Beard growing ability:
BG: sparse at best
Another easy one to judge, Bear barely has a dirtstache after a week in the woods.
Advantage: Les

Film making skills:
BG: rarely carries his own camera, only when doing something in a tight spot
LS: carries his own gear and sets up shots while surviving
While this gives Les more to worry about besides keeping alive, it also makes the situation less authentic for viewers.  Bear just keeps on going and has to worry about his camera crew making it too.
Advantage: Bear

Ability to use what you've got:
BG: he makes water filters out of t-shirts, catches fish with his pants and ties stuff with his belt.
LS: brings a fishing rod on trips, but he did start a fire with a flashlight which is neat.
Bear could do anything he wants to get food or build shelter if he was just dropped anywhere
Advantage: Bear

Crutch:
BG: flint stone
LS: tarp
Bear doesn't often make fires without use of his flint stone whereas Les uses twine, a flashlight, sticks, the sun, whatever he wants to basically.
Advantage: Les

Actual remoteness:
BG: middle of nowhere
LS: not too far out from a camp
Bear is getting dropped out of airplanes and jumping into rivers from helicopters while Les has some locals walk him out what seems like a mile or two.
Advantage: Bear

Age:
BG: 34
LS: 47
Les is more of a wily veteran, but is approaching a half century in age, so that will slow him down in colder weather, a la Brett Favre late in the NFL season.  Bear is younger but lacks some of the experience Les does.
Advantage: Push

Frequency of using own urine:
BG: He pees on his hand to separate it from a knife, he drinks pee, he pees on on his shirt and puts it on his head to protect from sunburn.
LS: Not very often
While Bear can use his pee for a multitude of things, is that really something to brag about?
Advantage: Push

What they use animal poo for:
BG: Extracting water.
LS: Keeping a fire burning while you go hunt for food.
While Bear's use is much more manly and disgusting, but Les' is more functional.
Advantage: Les

Typical food choice when surviving:
BG: snakes, bugs, gators
LS: berries, leafs, dandelions, fish
Les eats things that I would have no problem eating most of the time.  Bear does what he has to do and then some, he'll get that protein from a snake by biting its head off then throwing it over his neck like a snake necklace.
Advantage: Bear

Method of getting food:
BG: Sticks hand in catfish's mouth, wrestle a gator, grab a snake.
LS: Go fly fishing, set traps.
Les is more of a passive survivor, letting things come to him, while Bear is a go getter.
Advantage: Bear

Accent:
BG: English, he says things like Glacier, intestines and vitamins very humorously
LS: Slightly Canadian, he'll through an 'eh' or 'you know' in there every so often.
Each time you see Bear there is a chance he might say something else in a funny way.
Advantage: Bear

Other skills that have little to nothing to do with survival:
BG: Rugged good looks.
LS: Rugged good looks and plays a mean harmonica.
Both men agree you have to stay positive and keep your morale up and what better way then to hum some blues.
Advantage: Les

Winner: Bear Grylls.  Obviously, Stroud is just Les of a man than Bear.  The final tally has Bear on top 7-4-2.  He decided to celebrate the win with a fine meal.

-Jesse


Tuesday, January 20, 2009

College

Here is a little story I wrote a couple of years ago as I was getting ready to graduate college and move on to the next part of my life.  It's very heavy with figurative language, so try to keep up.  Hope you enjoy it.


Loved and Lost: College Graduation

College is a girl. In a nutshell, you meet her, fall for her, have a hot relationship a few years and then all of a sudden, it’s over. She leaves when she thinks you’re ready for the next step. She’s prepared to move on, but what about you? It almost always ends on her terms. There are a few guys who leave on their terms after three years and there are others who drag it out for almost a decade trying to hang on to her as long as possible, even though the last couple years aren’t as fun as the first few. This is the story of every the essential educational experience.

It starts out with you at the bar, checking out every girl in the room. You look at the pack of girls to your immediate left, you check out the ones on the other side of the bar; you give it a good 360, ending with a lap around the place to see if there’s anything – rather, anyone – that you may have missed. Eventually you cut out the really big ones, the artsy hipsters, the trashy townies and teensy weensy chicks. This helps you narrow it down to the cute to really hot girls you’ve got a shot with.

Next you consult your buddies and put several feelers. You get good vibes from a couple and spend the next part of the evening determining your chances at success with each of them. You weigh hotness with smarts, and long shots vs. sure things. Finally you commit and pick the best one for you. You take her on one date and fall in love, but you won’t be able to see her until autumn.

At first, she seems like a lot to handle, but you immediately fall in love. She makes you drink and smoke more than you ever have but she also makes it so much fun you don’t care that you’re letting yourself go a bit. She thinks beards are cool and doesn’t mind when you wear sweats or if you have on the same t-shirt three days in a row. She thinks hats make you look sexy and she’s gives you a free shirt every time you do something cool. It gets better; she loves video games, can’t get enough of them. Don’t even get me started on how many DVDs she wants you to watch.

By the time you leave her to go home for the holidays, you’re friends from home say she’s changed you. But half of them have started dating a girl too and they’re a bit different themselves. Each of your friends think that they’re girl is the greatest and you all trade stories, one-upping each other the whole time you’re home.

The whole time you’re together, you know it won’t last forever. You see things coming to an end, but when the breakup finally happens it crushes you. You had a good run, four, maybe five years. But she grabbed your heart from the time you saw her at the bar a while before you started dating.

Some of your friends will chase after her older sister and date for a year or two, but it’s never the same and the time you spent with her you’ll remember forever. She’ll still let you visit on weekends every year or so for a little fling, but as you get older, she takes more and more out of you until you can’t bare to visit anymore.

It takes a while to get over her for most guys. The deeper you were in love, the longer it takes to move on. Me? I thought I would chase her forever and sometimes I think about her older sister. I’m getting better now. I’m not as consumed with her as I used to be, but then again, it’s the summer and we usually took some time apart then. It always gets worse once fall comes around. Leaves start to change colors and drop and you remember how she changed you when you dropped everything you were doing to be with her.

Was she one of the great ones? Of course. She was the great one. The one that taught you how to love, taught you how to live, taught you how to have fun. She introduced you to your mentors, many other girlfriends, your best friends and maybe even your wife.

-Jesse

Saturday, January 17, 2009

It's about time....I may need a nickname because of it

I know I don't post as much or as often as JG, but thats just not me. I'm not a person who can follow a schedule for something like this. Money motivates me and thats about it, so until us meatballs get some lute, this will probably continue.

Now for some random thoughts...

The biggest sporting events of the weekend by far are the Championship games in the NFL. With that said, the bigger of those two would be the Steeler/Ravens game. This game is going to be the nastiest game of the century to this point. These two teams hate eachother. I've never put the pads on, but these guys did and they sum up this game better than I could. All I know is that it's going to be a really violent football game and I can't wait!

The amount of money airlines lose when their plane crashes and kills everyone on board is in the hundreds of millions. When this pilot landed safely in the Hudson River, he not only saved everyone on board, but he saved U.S Airlines hundreds of millions. That guy should walk into the U.S Airlines headquarters and say "I want 5 million dollars wired into my bank account, what are you going to do? Fire me?" That guy getting fired would be on headlines across the nation and on meatballs in the morning.

If you're going to Vegas before late March....

I don't know what was harder. Finding this article or believing that Brian Hartline was going pro. What a bum!

This was also hard to believe, but much easier to find the article.

Bradford, Williams, and Gresham don't go pro though? Someone is paying those kids to stay in school, I wasn't born yesterday. Plus, Bob Stoops is from Youngstown,Oh - one of the most corrupt cities in the country. Trust me, I know.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

1-on-1 Tourney delayed, the people are sad

Due to snow conditions similar to that in the picture above, the inaugural 1-on-1 tourney has been delayed indefinitely. We barely were out of the parking lot after about an hour on the road and only two participants made it at all. Keeps your eyes peeled to MITM for the reschedule date.

If you're curious about Lebron's new commercial, here's a report about who sponsored it. While we're on the topic, here are some pictures of the next commercial. Rumors as to what the ad is about have circulated around a dream that Bron Bron has imagining he is in the 'big game' playing for the Browns (a team that has never even been there) then wakes up and realizes that he's still a basketball player. Not sure what that has to do with insurance. Watch the game to find out.

California babygame Natalie Dylan is getting offers for close to $4 million for her virginity. She claims she'll have a OBGYN and lie detector confirm the fact AFTERWARD. That doesn't make any sense.

TO could be on the move, according to ESPN. Speaking of ESPN, here are some on-air hotties for the people.

The economy sucks, so what should you do? If you live in Ohio, get drunk, that's what. Also, in the buckeye state, sent from Brett, what a messed up relationship this is/will be.

Greatness.

-Jesse

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

2009 1-on-1 Basketball Tourney Bracket


(click to expand)

Each game is to 11, win by 2 and baskets are worth 1 and 2. Double elimination. Call your own foul and don't be gay about it. The inaugural event will be hosted on South Nelson Rd. in Columbus, OH on court #4. Tickets for the entire tournament are free and the only prize awarded will be to the winner of the whole thing. Drumroll please...The loser of game 15 will be a 3-time loser and therefore the worst player in America so he will have to buy the winner lunch. Vegas odds makers (Bobby Cans and Slevy) have the lines set for the opening round as follows.

Bryan -3 vs. Brett
Andy -2.5 vs. Jesse
Bo -2.5 vs. Jay
Tim -4.5 vs. Dave

-Jesse

Monday, January 12, 2009

Eddy Curry and Basketball

Eddy Curry. When you hear this name as a Knick fan, a few words and phrases come to mind: Lazy, heart problems, fat, wasted talent, tattoos, expiring contract, gay. Wait what? Yeah, I was surprised too when I checked out the late update from the Post. Take this with a large grain of salt though, since this was the same paper that reported a sexual harassment case with the boys from Cold Pizza a couple years back. Apparently the Knicks big man repeatedly solicited his male driver for sex and made him throw away his beat rags. I hope that some day there is a book written by someone inside the organization during the Isiah Years. Starbury's asking girls if "they're gonna get in the truck" or not, Zeke is calling women hoes and shaking them after games, and now this.

If I needed another reason to hate Joe Buck, here it is. How does the public feel about paying for Buck, McCarver and Aikman to get around? This guy is a clown.

1-on-1 Tournament
Sorry for the baseball interruption. Back to roundball, and more specifically, seven other guys at work and I are having a 1-on-1 tournament this Wednesday night. MITM fan Dirty D suggested I talk about it and toss out a little preview. To see where each of us are going to end up in the tourney, we first must look at where we've been. In alphabetical order, since I obviously rank highest in the group.

Andy
5'9"/185 /22/combo guard
Played Frosh basketball
Drives hard and plays no D
"I shall fear no man but God"

Bo
6'3"/three bills/24/power forward
Tons of Rec League experience
Post control
"I play to win... two words: Baby Hooks"

Brett
5'11 1/2"/220/24/power forward
Gave up playing for heckling freshman year of HS
Trash talk
"Decided in HS, it would be more fun to yell at refs that sit on the bench"

Bryan
6'/175*/24/5th man
Minimal experience beyond rooting
Keeping water cold
“His lanky height and disputed weight give him a competitive advantage over the rest of the tournament field”

Dave
5'10"/180/23/guard
"Basketball is like poetry in motion, cross the guy to the left, take him back to the right, he's fallin' back, then just J right in his face. Then you look at him and say, "What?"

Jay
5'10 1/2"/211/24/shooting guard
Playing since they cut the umbilical
Lefty shooter with deceptive speed
"I work harder than you in order to get easy shots"

Jesse
6'2"/195/24/forward
Blacktop and some church league
Unmatched tenacity
"We fly high, no lie, you know this. Ballin!"

Tim
6'5"/203/22/swingman
Two season HS ball
Slash and Crash
"We're talking about practice... not a game... but practice man"

Results to be posted later this week.

-Jesse

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Cuban Links

If you know me, you know I'm a big fan of beards and would have one right now if my boss would allow it.  Love the beard unity in Philly even though Andy Reid's is disgusting.

This is a little bit ridiculous.  Portland, how can you threaten the rest of the NBA from signing the former Perfect Score star?  That's like breaking up with a girl, then threatening the rest of America from dating her.  If you didn't want her to date anyone else, then don't break up with her in the first place.  Good for the Grizz for standing up to them.  I mean it's not like they can get any worse than the league's lowest all time winning percentage.

With Colt McCoy deciding to stay in college for his senior year, his brother, Pitt RB LeSean McCoy has been flip flopping like John Kerry on his draft status.  He will definitely be the best McCoy in the draft this season, so why not have that going for you and leave early?

New Yankee, A.J. Burnett's wife is a straight babygame.  More evidence.

-Carl Pavano

Sit on it, American Idle.  Maybe if you didn't lie about injuries, leave the team for no apparent reason, not come watch a game vs. the Rays when you were rehabbing down the street and just be terrible overall, you would get some support.

-Jesse

Friday, January 9, 2009

33-3-3 Live Blog!

6:53: Tonight's roster and vital stats:

Name- height/weight/max # of 40s/in one sitting, max # of nuggets in one sitting

Jesse -6'1"/187/2.5/20
Spence- 6'5"/203/2/20-25
Wharff- 6'3"/179/4/20
Dave- 5'10"/186/2/20
Jay- 5'10 1/2"/211/1/23ish

We'll kick it off at 7 pm with the puck drop!

7:00 pm: Jim Day is kicking us off shortly.  We have all the contestants and three lady judges ready to roll.  Ally from work says "good luck, no nugget milkshakes this time"

7:06 pm:  Patiently waiting, the anthem is being sung right now by a man who looks like he has had much more than 33 nuggets in his life.  FUN FACT: Jay has only had one 40 his whole life.  Puck drop in 3...2....1 BEGIN!  


7:10 pm:  Spence is the first done with 10 nuggets

7:12 pm:  All five have completed their first 10 nuggets.

7:15 pm:  Spence the machine has eaten 20 nuggets with with over 16 minutes remaining in the first period!

7:17 pm: No score yet in the game.  Wharff has finished his 20.  He had 11 in his second box (BONUS NUG!)  but Lindsay ate it for him.  

7:21 pm:  Came to the conclusion that Head Coach Ken Hitchcock could easily knock out 33 nuggets...in about 10 minutes.

7:25 pm:  Jackets take the lead 1-0 over the Caps on an Umberger goal assisted by Jake Voracek.  Spence the Machine is on nugget 29.  No one has finished a 40 yet.

7:28 pm: Wharff has finished his first 40 with 9:31 remaining in the first period.  Spence has got to the 30 mark of nuggets as has Jay.  Jay just grabbed his last three so stay tuned.

7:31 pm:  Jay just finished 33!! All he's got left is 2.5 40s!

7:37 pm:  Wharff and I just finished our last three and have knocked off the 33 portion of the 33-3-3!

7:47 pm: 1st period has come to an end.  Wharff is in front right now with all 33 nuggets done and about a quarter of the 2nd 40 down the hatch.  I check in right behind him with my nuggets done and two sips into my 2nd 40.  Jay is  "pretty full" after 33 nuggets and three fourths of his first 40 done.  Dave JUST finished his first 40 and has eaten around 23 nuggets.  Spence has "hit a wall" after 30 nuggets and half his first 40.   Brett from work just called! FUN FACT: I blew the minds of everyone at McDonalds when I ordered 170 nuggets!

8:11 pm:  BREAKING NEWS!!  Spence just knocked over my 2nd 40, which lost several ounces as a result and also became flatter than Kate Moss.  The judge committee decided that I have to drink one 12 oz bud light to make up for the beer lost and Spence has to tape his last 40 to both of his hands as punishment.  Jay just finished his first 40.  Wharff is still leading with nor mush of his second 40 left.  Still 1-0 left with 14 minutes to go in the 2nd period.

8:16 pm:  Wharff is done with his 2nd 40 and can officially put it on cruise control from here on out.  Spence the Machine finally finished the first 40 and still has three nuggets and two 40s to go.  I am just sips away from knocking out my second.  The judges went out and got their own food and Lindsay got a 40 herself.  GET SOME! 

8:19 pm:  FUN FACT: It's Dave's birthday day midnight!

8:27 pm: FUN FACT: roughly 2700 calories are being consumed by each of tonights participants.

8:35 pm: I am knocking out my beer right now, getting ready to finish.  3 minutes left in the 2nd period, Jackets still up 1-0.  In other news, the Cavs are up 33-23 at the end of the 1st.

8:38 pm: Jackets up 2-0 at the end of the 2nd.  Cavs up 34-27.  Black Hole Sun is on shuffle and we are just rocking out like rock stars.  Jay went for a smoke break, hoping that will lead his body to rally.

8:47 pm: The Cavs must have 17 alternate jerseys.

8:51 pm:  Second period getting ready to begin.  Jay, Spence and Dave need to catch up according to Ally's BBM.

8:55 pm:  Wharff is DONE AND DONE.  He is all finished before the 3rd period has even started.  All he has to do to complete the challenge is keep it all down by the final horn.

9:01 pm: Baby bro called, I hope he completes the 999, the 3333 and whatever the 444 is  by the time he graduates.  In other news, Spence just left to change tampons.  

9:05 pm:  Spence the Machine has finished his nuggets and is about 20% finished with his 2nd 40!

9:09 pm:  Meghan decided than next time we have a challenge you have to put your man card in a bowl before you start...only getting it back once you complete the task.

9:14 pm:  halfway through the 3rd period.... Wharff is done, Jay, Dave and I have a shot at it with some 40 left, but Spence needs a miralce with 1.75 40s left.

9:21 pm: I'm done!  Jay and Dave are close.  Dave much closer than Jay who has 3/4 of a 40 left with just 8 minutes left in the game!

-Jesse

CELEBRITY POST-9:30pm

This is for the people.  Jay and TSpence are down for the count.  1  2  3.  Can they make it.  Maybe if they had my stomach.  I love the people and the sheer facct that this may be the easiest challege of my life is besides the point.  

Blogger Out,

9:40 pm:  Wow it's still pretty early but the game is over.  Jackets beat the Caps 3-0.  Incredible.  Dave, Wharff and I finished the challenge.  This leaves Wharff and I as two time legends and dave at 1 for 1.  Spence and Jay have got some room to grow.

10:10 pm:  Cavs are up 12 with 7 to go in th e4th.  Pretty much feeling like a Legend.  Just burned a duece with Jay and Dave and we are so money at this point after 33 nuggets, 3 4os and a couple beers.  I should probablt stop posting soon.

10:25pm: Cleveland is up big.  The Celtics are done, losing 7 out of 9 after winning 27 out of 29.  That may or may not be correct.

10:31 pm:  When will it be released that Cortland Finnegan and Delonte West are the same person?


-Jesse

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Florida vs. Oklahoma BCS Championship Live Blog!

7:33 PM: I just took Florida on the adjusted line -10.5 for +160 to my money.

7:35 PM: Talked to my buddy Swim and he likes Florida. He has never picked a winner in his life. I'm screwed.

8:04 PM: Tom Brennanaman is going to be aweful to listen to in this game.

8:05 PM: At this point I am going to introduce someone to meatballsinthemorning. I will not reveal his real name so, we will refer to him as the Wise Meatball.

The Wise Meatball just said "Volanda, looks like a sweet piece of dark chocolate with pecans in the middle".

8:09 PM: Florida looks real mean!

8:11 PM: A skyline meal was just placed on the coin flip between the Wise Meatball and my other freind. TWMB has tails or Oklahoma depending on what's on the coin.

8:15 PM: And the toss is........................................................The black ref just interrupted the short white dude, its tails! TWMB wins a skyline meal.

8:20 PM: These gators look fresh on D!! They were all over him.

8:25 PM: That O-line for Oklahoma is The Best in College Football.

8:27 PM: I don't know about this Okla. snap count.

8:28 PM: Due to the circumstances I stated above, I will not be posting when Florida has the rock.

8:40 PM: I'm starting to get a little nervous that the young choir boy is going to meltdown in this game and turn into a drunk and go undrafted in next years draft -TWMB.

8:48 PM: Is Bob Stoops really arguing that holding call here with 5:56 left in the first?

8:50 PM: This game is being called terribly.

9:03 PM: I just lost a game of foosball for the computer the rest of the night and got leveled 10-4. I'm signing out, peace.

-Mikey

Links, Christmas Shopping and a Teaser

"Hazing is a fun way to show a new employee that she is not welcome or liked." - Dwight Schrute.

My man Slevy sent this to me. Unprecedented, but it sort of makes sense, no? I mean that's more important to a person than a car, TV, house, etc.

Sean Avery gets six games and a dismissal from the Stars for talking about NHL players dating his sloppy seconds and this gets you just two games off. Really?

Wow, there's a new Fast & Furious movie coming out and Vin Diesel is back. Holy crap, I could not be more excited about this book of my childhood becoming a movie this year!

Here's a safety tip for you online shoppers. Speaking of shopping, now that the holiday season is over, I wanted to share my thoughts on buying presents for your significant other. A few weeks ago, myself and some of the other guys at work with girlfriends/fiancees were talking about what we were getting them for Christmas. I mentioned that my girl told me she wanted sunglasses like three months before Christmas. She even sent me two options to choose from. This is perfect, so I still feel like I was really involved in the thought process of getting her a gift. A couple of guys thought that took the 'fun' out of it. Fun? I don't see how looking high and low for something she might like, stressing out about it, wondering how much I should spend and all that is fun. That seems like work to me. I like to shoot from the hip and I appreciate things being said straight forward. It doesn't get much more straight forward than, "I want this, here are two choices, it's up to you. Go nuts!" I wish everyone in my life that I have to buy a present for would do this.

A lot of you already know that The Three Kevins and I became, no, solidified our status as legends by completing the 999 all star challenge back in July. We got so excited about the whole thing we decided to branch out and have been brainstorming the challenges over the last few months and finally came to an agreement on the hockey equivalent. This Friday night during the Blue Jackets vs. Capitals game, we will attempt the inaugural 33-3-3. This manly event includes consuming 33 McDonalds nuggets and 3 40s over the span of three periods of hockey. There are a half dozen or so contestants this time around so we'll have well over 200 nuggets on my coffee table. In related news, we are proud to announce the first MITM live blog will be documenting the conquest. Video evidence will be provided by Kevin Wharff and uploaded to youtube and facebook soon after editing. Up next, the 100-100-100?

Check back in around 6:45 pm EST tomorrow for the live blog.

-Jesse

Friday, January 2, 2009

Playoff Preview, Pt. 3

Conference Championships
Down to my picks for the final three games of the season, the Conference championships and the 'big game.' As I see it, we'll have Pittsburgh at Tennessee in the AFC and Carolina at New York in the NFC. Both games would be rematches, with the former Oilers knocking around the Steelers in Nashville. We also saw the G-Men protecting their house and knocking of the Panthers in OT back in week 16. This marks the fifth AFC Championship rematch ('02, '03, '06 and '07) of the decade and the fourth in the NFC ('02, '03, '07) over the same time. The AFC team who won the regular season matchup has won the rematch every time (4-0), while their NFC counterpart has lost each game (0-3). This provides a contrasting view to my pre-research, gut feeling opinion on these games.

In the first Steelers vs. Titans matchup, Ben had to handle a lot of the offense and threw for big yards but also had four turnovers, while Collins managed the Titans to a win and leaned on Lendale White and Chris Johnson who each scored a TD. Look for Roethlisberger to stay away from Michael Griffin who had both interceptions and returned one of them for a score. This game was close going into the half with Tennessee clinging to to a 3-point lead, but it got out of hand when they put up 21 in the second half on the vaunted Steelers D. Look for the pride of that defense come through and have the team in white and blue feeling black and blue at the end of the game. I like the Steelers to beat the Titans to make their second trip to the league championship in four years.

Back to the defending champs and their quest to repeat. The Giants snuck past the Panthers in their week 16 game to lock up the number one seed. New York held Steve Smith to his second lowest output of the season as he only pulled in three catches for 47 yards. It's not like he was in a rut either, Smith headed into the game with four straight Sundays of 100+ yards receiving. I don't think any defense can keep him under wraps the second time he faces them, so look for him to get the ball in the open field and make some plays this game. The Panthers gave up the lead three separate times, letting New York erase deficits of 4, 11, and 8. I see another history-bucking outcome in this one with the Giants coming out on top in a lower scoring game than the first time around.

"The Big Game"
Steelers vs. Giants. A contest between the champs from 2005 and 2007. No matter what happens over the next season, this decade belonged to the Patriots. However, they have not won a 'ship since 2004, so one can make an argument that whoever wins this game becomes the runner-up for Team of the Decade honors and the best team of the second part of the 2000s.

The two championship runs were made in a similar fashion. Both teams made the playoffs as a wildcard and had to win three in a row on the road to get to the big one. This time around both teams are favorites (Vegas has the Giants at 2-1 to win the whole thing and Steelers at 9-2) have a bye and host most or all of the games on the road to the 'ship. This could be a classic game and Plaxico has to be shooting himself that he can't be on the field - Oh wait. These two met week 8 in Pittsburgh and the Giants came out on top 21-14. The Clocktower threw a season high four interceptions while Eli Manning never gave the ball up. The Steeler D didn't let the Giant O in the end zone until there were three minutes left on the clock. When you have a +4 turnover differential, you have to win by more than a touchdown.

I pick the Steelers to win the game and foil the Giants plan to go back-to-back. We all remember what happened last year in a rematch. Pats beat Giants week 17, Giants exact revenge in the worst way. I don't see Roethlisberger having four INTs again and the Steelers will force turnovers this time around. Pittsburgh wins their sixth 'ship!

Check back in February when I grade my picks. I hope my predictions all go wrong and the Fish beat the Birds to win it.

-Jesse