Friday, August 28, 2009

Fake Sports and Activities that I Would Medal in, if they were Real Sports in the Olympics

Spitting gum out of my mouth and catching it again- I would excel at both height of gum and consecutive times caught. This is a favorite past time of mine and something that usually impresses the ladies.

Carrying groceries- In number of bags and overall weight, I can carry an absurd amount of groceries with one hand. The only problem I encounter with some regularity, is getting the bags from hand to kitchen counter. I'm working on it.

Eating pasta- I can't speed eat but in terms of quantity, I could shovel spaghetti carbonara, penne alla vodka or linguini alfredo for hours. It was unnatural when as a child I would outeat my nana, grandpa, cousins and aunt and uncle, combined. Also, I can eat a ton of pancakes and cereal, for what it's worth.

Beer bong- While some people I know (read: AWWW Spit) can chug a glass of beer faster than you can say 'wow, that's fast', I think I'm pretty epic when it comes to the classic (one can of natty) beer bong.

Spitting far- I can spit pretty far as is, but after a cold sunkist (not sure if that is considered a PED or not), I might be able to spit to the Central Time Zone.

What are some of yours?



  1. -Finding deals/steals on E-Bay
    -Skipping rocks
    -Making an ice cream cone (soft serve only)

  2. I can throw a grape in the air as high as I could and still catch it in my mouth while playing the wind.....t-spain