Thursday, September 9, 2010

Major League's 2010 Opening NFL Power Rankings

Week 1

Team Opponent SoS 2009 Sos
1 Indianapolis @HOU 14.5 15.8
2 New Orleans MIN 17.5 17.9
3 NY Jets BAL 15.4 15.2
4 Baltimore @NYJ 15.4 15.1
5 San Diego @KAN 17.9 17.4
6 Green Bay @PHI 15.7 17.9
7 Minnesota @NOR 15.2 17.4
8 New England CIN 13.4 13.8
9 Dallas @WAS 14.2 16.9
10 Cincinnati @NWE 13.3 14.6
11 Houston IND 12.7 15.4
12 NY Giants CAR 15.2 16.2
13 Tennessee OAK 13.8 14.1
14 Pittsburgh ATL 14.8 15.1
15 San Francisco @SEA 19.7 18.3
16 Miami @BUF 14.4 12.6
17 Atlanta @PIT 16.4 15.2
18 Carolina @NYG 16.9 14.5
19 Denver @JAC 15.6 14.5
20 Jacksonville DEN 14.9 15.5
21 Philadelphia GNB 13.2 15.8
22 Washington DAL 14.7 16.5
23 Arizona @STL 18.1 16.9
24 Detroit @CHI 15.2 15.1
25 Chicago DET 14.4 15.8
26 Oakland @TEN 16.2 14.0
27 Kansas City SDG 17.9 16.1
28 Tampa Bay CLE 16.2 13.6
29 Seattle SFO 18.6 16.6
30 Cleveland @TAM 13.4 14.5
31 St. Louis ARI 18.9 15.6
32 Buffalo MIA 13.0 13.0

Indy – I mean, they win about 95% of their regular season games for the last 5 years (if you exclude the games they play 2nd string). Since this isn’t the playoffs, they are the #1.

New Orleans – Playing Tampa and Carolina 4x a year must be nice. Madden curse alert.

Jets – This is inflated because Rex Ryan’s speeches unfortunately can’t be their own team. I need a GD snack.

Baltimore – On paper, they’re good. I want to see how 3 possession receivers do though before we have Denny Green crown them.

San Diego – Uhh, why do people think V Jackson is that big of a deal? They have more than enough to hide his absence.

Green Bay – Everyone is talking about Aaron Rogers, but I’d just like to thank Ryan Grant for helping me win my work fantasy football league last year

Minnesota – They rank this high now, but I’m guessing they are in the teens after week 4. Expect the IR to start filling up.

New England – Tom Brady’s hair is just the worst. It looks like Justin Beiber grew up, went to the hair stylist, and asked for the McGuyver.

Dallas – They’ll be good early, and suck late. Which btw, great summary of a date.

Cincinnati – I love me my Bengals. However, I’d like to see Palmer not overthrow too many people before I trust him some more.

Houston – 8-8 seems to be their motto. I expect Andre Johnson to regress a little this year.

NY Giants – Sneaky good this year. All they have to do is retire Brandon Jacobs jersey. Maybe he’ll take the hint.

Tennessee – Say what you want about Vince Young, but he wins. And throws punches.

Pittsburgh – You think Ben’s pocket vision works at these bars where he can find the unsuspecting girl to ruffie?

San Francisco – They are the best team in the worst division ever. Congrats?

Miami – Until your defense can stop anyone, I don’t want to hear about how good that offense is.

Atlanta – Matt Ryan is okay. At best. They’ll be better this year, and maybe even make the wild card, but it will take a few weeks to shake the rust off.

Carolina – No Jake Delhomme = A good thing.

Denver – Who is their primary receiver? No really. I don’t know.

Jacksonville – 35,000 fans are very nervous about MJD’s injury status. Only half of those fans have season tickets.

Philly – Too much turnover to be good right out of the gate. But on offense at least, they have the talent.

Washington – McNabb and Portis are a deadly Combo. In 2004.

Arizona – Not a good sign that starter wasn’t good enough for the Browns! And Delhomme is better!

Detroit – Jahvid Best is a great name. Not as good as Kareem Huggins, but still.

Chicago – This turkey is done cooking. Cubs suck. So do the bears.

Oakland – Jamarcus Russell was a worse decision than MTV execs not having Jersey Shore cast mates in a Real World Challenge yet.

Kansas City – Thomas Jones adds a valuable piece to this team. Experience in winning. That’s 1 of 53 for those keeping track at home.

Tampa Bay- This team looks like somebody took a crap or dump in the printer.

Seattle – God hates Seattle. A lot. I think they’ll be fighting for 2 wins.

Cleveland – God hates Cleveland. Maybe even more. Howeva, I think they win 5 or 6 games this year, but unfortunately, it’ll come after they’re out of contention.

St Louis. – Terrible. Take a lap.

Buffalo – A real chance of going 0-16. CJ Spiller can’t run when there’s 9 guys in the box. Trust me

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