Sunday, June 12, 2011

Live Blog of NBA Finals Game 6

7:45 Mavs up 3-2. Mario Chalmbers starting over Mike Bibby. We're 20 minutes from tip. LeBron is still a little girl in a skirt

7:50 Wade claiming he had a real cough, then made a joke that, according to him, maybe possibly wasn't about Dirk's fever earlier in the series, and it if was, it was just to see if the media blew it up was much like the Jim Tressel "cover-up worst than the crime" situation.

7:54 I'm glad they put out two unimportant Heat players so LeBron didn't have to go out there and shake some heroes' hands. He doesn't need anymore distractions.

7:57 Button your shirt Marc Anthony. You're singing the NATIONAL ANTHEM, not some club song.

7:59 Are there more police dramas or hospital dramas on IMDB?

8:01 Good thing they get LeBron out of the way early in player intros...he's not good late anywhere.

8:04 BONUS INPUT FROM GUS (VIA TEXT) "Two legacies enter, one legacy leaves. There can be only one."

8:05 I'll put Gus' texts in quotes to distinguish them from mine from here on out. Also, I pick the Mavs to close it out tonight. Also, HOLY CRAP DID YOU SEE THOSE MIC FLAGS, they are little TV screens that change images from ESPN logo, to Larry O'Brien Trophy and some other things too.

8:08 Chalmers just air-balled a 3. Real life.

8:11 Lebron James is outscoring the entire Mavs team. 5-4.

8:12 Gus comes in with a slightly late prediction, more specific than mine, "Mavs, by 5."

8:14 Gus with more heat on the Heat, "3 to 1 odds that Wade goes out on a stretcher and comes back to the game as if he's a hero a la Paul Pierce."

8:16 LeBron 4-4 from the field for 9 pts.

8:17  Gus says, "LeBron is hitting his jumpers, which is dangerous. Problem is, if he falls in love with that play, it could be bad news for Miami. That's not his game."

8:23 How do they change the score so fast at the bottom of the screen? I know "live" events are on 7-sec delay, but is it possible that the game is on that speed, but the scorebox is really live? It's either that or the guy who's in charge of the box has super fast fingers. 

8:24 TWO FOULS ON DIRK. Tim Donaghy?

8:25 And the Jet is in the building. Two quick, pretty Js for five points in a short time.

8:31 ABC Broadcast team. STOP MAKING EXCUSES for LeBron being a douche.

8:32 Jason Terry's jumper is wetter than a white T-Shirt on a sorority girl on Spring Break in Cancun. Gus adds "-5 with Dirk on the bench over 3 minutes? Way to miss an opportunity, Miami."


8:34 "Mike Miller is like Reggie Miller, except he's not a very good shooter." -Gus

8:40 Mavs are on a 19-6 run since 5:11 remaining in the 1st.

8:43 Make that 25-6. also, see above, re: DESHAWN STEVENSON. Gus agrees, "Deshawn "Reggie Miller" Stevenson."

8:51 Heat on 9-0 run as Bosh keeps hitting that mid-range shot.

8:53 Basketball is, indeed, a game of runs as Wade assists House on a three to put Heat up 42-40 (after he had a tremendous block on Chandler). Then Stevenson shoves Chalmers, right before the break...

8:58 Gus is amped up, "Why go to commercial there!?" I second that. He adds, "Deshawn hit 3 threes and started a fight and I STILL didn't get the hand in front of the face thing."

9:01 Dirk is 1-8 for 3 pts right now. BUT the Mavs are only down 1.

9:06 Gus checks in, "Shouldn't they wait for Eddie House to go to the line to chant MVP tonight?" And how about the Jet? 14 pts in 13 mins. FIRE.

9:09 What else did the people expect when Dallas plays in the American Airlines Center and the Heat play in the American Airlines Arena. The Jet has taken off (and over) with 17 points in 15 minutes on 7-9 shooting. Good for a +9.

9:13 Dirk 1-11. He's far off Kobe's 8-24 in a championship-clincher clip from last year.

9:15 Gus says, "2 missed FT's and an airball. Did someone tell LeBron it's the 4th quarter?" BAM roasted.

9:18 Gonna have a trainer work on my fingers during halftime. Maybe get them some ice. See you in 20.

9:39 How does Barea do it? Just slipped through the paint.

9:40 The Heat passed up 2-3 open shots on that possession before Dirk hit a shot.

9:43 Dirk still doesn't have it offensively, but did you see that vintage Shawn "Don't forget they used to call me The Matrix" Marion rebound and putback?

9:46 Chandler with his fourth foul, Bosh with a perfect dinosaur/Avatar face in slow-mo.

9:49 70% chance Gus' phone is dead b/c we haven't heard from him in more than 30 mins. WOW LeBron had JJ BAREA on him and not only did he not score, he committed a foul!

9:51 My dog Madison has no interest in this game. Her passing out on the red chair is as predictable as LeBron missing shots late in the Finals.

Maddie passed out on this chair is as predictable as LeBron vanishing in the 4th Q of a finals game

9:55 The Custodian, just mopping sweat up off the floor with his jersey as he takes a charge. Basketball is FUNdamental!

9: 59 Gus returns, "Does the world realize that if LeBron lays a goose egg in the 4th quarter it means that Dan Gilbert's letter becomes a little more accurate?"

10:01 Will that be LeBron's last FG of the year with the 4th Q just 90 ticks away?

10:04 J. Kidd. Dallas is 10-20 from 3pt land and the Heat are 14-24 from FT line.

10:06 Gus chimes in after LeBron hits his first FT of the game, "Wow. Shaq hit a free throw."

10:11 More Gus, "Too bad Spo didn't say 'LeBron just needs teammates that don't choke in the clutch"

10:13 Hmmm. ABC said foul was on Chandler, and PA said foul was on Dirk. What's up?

10:14 Guess it's on Dirk. He's got 4 fouls now, that's rough. At least JJ is stroking 3s and grabbing boards.

10:18 This 80-year old is a very accurate representation of about 80% of the Heat fan base. Representative of 80% of Heat fans

10:19 D-D-D-D-Dallas and the Jet.

10:25 Dirk better hit some shots here or it's going to be weird when David Stern (or Adam Silver or whoever) hands Dirk the Finals MVP trophy after he shoots 5-26 tonight. Gus with a killer line, "Talents to South Beach. Legacy to Hell."

10:28 Wait what quarter is it? Did someone change the clocks to fool LeBron that it's not the 4th? He hit one bucket, let's not get too excited.

10:29 Bosh, Wade, Chalmers, Haslem all making more plays in the final quarter than "The King."

10:30 Maybe Sarah Barelleis should do a remix to King of Anything for LeBron and call it King of Nothing.

10:32 That movie with Charlie from Always Sunny and Michael Bluth from Arrested Development looks hilaaaaaaarious. Almost as funny as the old LeBron-Jordan comparisons.

10:35 Did someone tell LeBron the ball has cooties? No help defense, doesn't even have the ball in his hands long enough to dribble before he passes.

10:38 Dirk just woke up. It's almost time to cue Lil Flip.

10:40 It's time. Congratulations Dallas. 

10:41 Last words from Gus... "In the words of Prince, 'Game. Blouses.'"

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