Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Holiday Rankings

With Summer unofficially starting two weekends ago after a splendid Memorial Day Weekend, I thought it would be a good time to rank the Holidays we celebrate in America. First, we'll run through the ones that exist, but don't really have much awesomeness about them. In most cases, the reasons for their existence are majorly significant, but they don't do a lot for me today.

President's Day, Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, Veteran's Day
-I get it. All historically very important, but I haven't had a day off for them in years.
Hannakuh, Yom Kippur, Rosh Hashana 
-I'm not Jewish.
Kwaanza
-I'm not whatever group of people who celebrate this.
Cinco de Mayo
-I had a reaaaaal bad run of May 5s the last three years, so it's not been a good look for me...team I was working for folded in 2008; sliced my pinkie open to the tune of eight stitches in 2009; thought my company was going to be sold and everyone was going to get laid off in 2010.
Columbus Day
-Big day back in NY with a day off and an awesome parade, but oddly enough Columbus, Ohio does little to nothing to celebrate it's namesake's day.
Labor Day
-The end of Summer, the start of school? No thanks.
Valentine's Day
-The most overrated holiday in the history of Holidays.

Now onto the next group. The ones that are pretty legit and come with three-day weekends or big parties.
St. Patrick's Day
-The Irish really took over with this one. Tons of big parades, lots of green beer and pretty decent food, but since it's usually on a weekday and I have a job, I miss out on the fun.
Green Beer Day
-Miami University alums, STAND UP!
Memorial Day
-Indy 500. The start of Summer. Three-day weekend. What else do you want?
New Year's Eve
-Still one of the most overrated Holidays out there, but can be pretty fun if you make the right moves. Such as a late dinner somewhere quiet, a good friend's house, a hockey or basketball game.
New Year's Day
-Yeah, I'm considering them separate, so what? Good college football going on all day, fresh start to the year, and more recently, the NHL's Winter Classic. A very good look for everyone involved.
Halloween
-Peaking in college, this Holiday has something for everyone. Candy and killer costumes when you're a kid...sexy and offensive costumes in college and the few years after. 

Later this week, we'll run down the top contenders, including: Easter, Christmas Eve, Independence Day, Christmas and Thanksgiving.


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