Sunday, April 24, 2011

Rock Paper Scissors is NOT a Sport, Round 4

Gus, Gus, Gus. You can find fatties in any other league, clearly. Who else is going to protect Tom Brady's precious knee and pretty hair? Why be a DH if you're in good enough shape to play the field? But there isn't a sport where you can fill the league with fatties and it will work. However, in the Rock Paper Scissors League/Association/whatever its called, you can do that. Which, in turn, revokes is status as a sport.

To address your argument of a baseball hurler being as active as a rock hurler, I can barely take that serious. As a pitcher, during a wind-up, or from the stretch, you use your whole body to get every drop of energy required to throw the ball with that velocity. If you stand as still as a Rock Paper Scissors competitor, you'd have little speed on the ball and it'd get hit all over the park. They may only have 25-30 repetitions of physical activity lasting only three or four seconds each and only do that three times a week, but at least their whole body is involved. As opposed to just their wrist and fingers.

New point of contention: You can sit down and be actively playing Rock Paper Scissors. That is a monumental strike against its sport-hood. I tried to think of all the sports you could counter me with where sitting down happens and the best I could think of is crew/rowing. Sure, you're sitting in that one, but you use your entire upper body and probably your core and legs too (I've never done that, so I can't be sure, but it seems like that makes sense).

So if your entire league can be made up of fat guys sitting down, I can't, in good conscious, call what you do a sport.

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